Posted tagged ‘confidence’

7 ways to boost Self Esteem

February 25, 2014

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It can be really difficult to try lifting your self-esteem up during bad times – when you’re dealing with a disability, when you’re having a difficult time getting along with someone you care about, when you are being pushed to your limits at work, when you’re going through financial difficulties, and so on.

In times like these, all you can think to do is blame yourself for not being likeable, for not doing good enough, and for always failing.

You may even think of hurting yourself and giving up completely.

But in order to get through life’s adversities, self-esteem is of prime importance.

Below is a list of things you can do to raise your self-esteem.

You may notice that that along the way, your inner critical self will start to build resistance to prevent you from feeling better. But that’s okay.

Just carry on with your best efforts. Over time, you will find yourself feeling a lot better and more than capable of facing life’s challenges.

Treat yourself well.
Make it your daily goal to treat yourself well.

Take care of yourself by eating healthy foods, exercising regularly, and getting enough rest and sleep.

Avoid habits that could be detrimental to your health like smoking, excessive alcohol drinking, and negative thinking.

Talk to yourself in a polite way.
During tough times you might get caught up with the critical voices inside you saying “you are no better”, “you are a loser”, “you won’t ever get it right”, and so on.

Try not to get carried away with them. Instead, tell yourself “you can do this”, “you are smart”, and “you are capable of succeeding”.

Intentionally replace the negative thoughts with positive affirmations.

Spend time with friends and family.
Spend more time with people who treat you well and have genuine concern and care for you. Their support is vital to your self-esteem.

Avoid negative, difficult people who see nothing in you but your flaws. You don’t need them at this point in your life.

Start small.
Studies suggest that the small achievements we have can significantly boost our well-being and self-esteem.

As you look for the bigger outcome, be thankful of the little goals you have accomplished.

They will give you the confidence you need to survive a difficult challenge.

Forgive yourself.
If you didn’t make it this time, it’s okay. Don’t punish yourself for failing.

Don’t be too tough on yourself. Remember that mistakes are part of a successful journey as they give you an opportunity to expand your learning.

Forgiving yourself is a great way to raise your self-esteem rather than indulging in self-pity.

Don’t compare.
Comparing your life with that of other people and finding out that they excel in one area of life can further crash your self-esteem.

Comparing does not only make you feel unhappy. It is also unfair for that person, as you don’t know what they have gone through.

You are only seeing one aspect of their life. Instead of focusing on the success of others, you should try being better than you were yesterday.

Also, learn to accept yourself, including your limitations and weaknesses.

While there are things you can change, you also have to realise that there are things that you cannot change.

Loving yourself just the way you are is better you than hating yourself.

Do things you enjoy.
Don’t forget to give yourself a little downtime. You have been dealing with a lot of things in the past days, weeks or months.

You deserve to have a break. Do things that cheer you up, whether it’s baking, cooking, writing poems, sketching, or dancing.

Once you have restored, if not improved your self-esteem, you will find yourself effectively dealing with difficult situations you encounter in life.

I look forward to hearing your feedback,  let me know how successful these techniques were for you,  or please forward them onto to someone you may know that needs them.

Richard Scott
Clinical hypnotherapist
Www.greymatterz.co.uk

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Build your confidence

November 23, 2010

Great post – reblogged for your perusal.

Confidence is vital in almost every aspect of our lives yet a lot of people struggle to find the confidence that lies within.  Confidence shows in a person’s behaviour and language.  However if you have difficulties with your level of confidence, the good news that confidence is something that can be learned and built upon.

What is Confidence?

Confidence goes hand in hand with self esteem.  If you believe in yourself, you will naturally become confident.  Believing in yourself means that you will do what you think is right, you will take risks, you will admit your mistakes and learn from them, and you will be able to take praise or compliments graciously.

Confidence is important in your relationships, work, parenting, life skills, self expression, self improvement, your openness to change, and the ability to take on new challenges.  It comes from within yourself, from others, and from your achievements.

How to Improve your Confidence

One way that you can improve your confidence is by taking control of the way you feel.  You can do this by remembering a time that you felt truly self confident or happy.  You will also need to control your self-consciousness.

If you feel self-conscious, take the focus off yourself by focusing on something in your environment.  Something as simple as admiring a piece of furniture will help you to forget the way that you are feeling.

If you feel self-conscious in a social environment, it can help to focus on the reason that you are there in the first place.  Are you there to make friends, relax other people, find out information, or make contacts?  By finding out your goal, you will be able to connect with people that have the same goal as you.  Being in an environment where the other people are there for the same reasons that you are will help you to feel more relaxed and confident.

Also watch out for criticism, both from other people and yourself.  While constructive criticism is helpful, some criticism is unneeded and unwanted.  Examples of this include “I’m not funny, why am I here?” or “you could do this so much better…”

If you find yourself thinking or saying such things, turn it around by saying “that joke didn’t go down so well but there’s always another”, or “I like the way you did this but next time it might be easier if you..”

Hypnosis to Improve Confidence

Hypnosis is a tool that you can use to turn around your negative ways of thinking in order to create more confidence within yourself.  People are born with confidence.  This confidence may lessen over time due to the experiences that we have.

Hypnosis helps by helping you to remove negative thinking and behaviours so that you can start to focus on yourself and what you really want.  By developing new, more positive ways of thinking and behaving, your confidence will increase as a result.

Other Ways to Improve Confidence

Some ways that you can help yourself to become more confident include:

  • find a person that you admire and learn from them
  • focus on your achievements – even if you didn’t succeed, find out what went wrong and vow to improve it next time
  • act confident
  • ensure that you are prepared for a task
  • gain some new skills – you can never been over-prepared
  • learn how to relax – deep breathing or meditation can be invaluable when you are feeling stressed
  • smile
  • set goals for yourself that you know that you can achieve
  • reward yourself when you succeed
  • learn how to handle rejection – tell yourself that it’s not because you’re not good enough, it could be any number of factors such as a bad mood, incompatibility, bad timing, a misunderstanding, etc
  • take the feedback that you get and use it to help you succeed the next time around
  • learn how to manage your emotions
  • find the humour in a situation
  • don’t let yourself think negatively
  • persevere

If you need help boosting your own confidence, just visit my website http://www.greymatterz.co.uk and get in touch.