Useful tips to beat your daily stress

It’s true that stress is always present in our life. It’s there everywhere we look, everywhere we go, and in everything we do. Even sleeping and doing nothing can become stressful at times. But stress doesn’t have to dismantle our life and prevent us from being happy and healthy. With the following easy techniques, you can cope with stress effectively and live life to the fullest!

Stretch it out.

Headache, fatigue, stiff neck, and cramps are all signs of stress. Chronic stress makes our muscles so tensed that they get swollen and become painful over time. This leads to undesirable symptoms, including pain. Stress also undermines blood circulation, which in turn makes your body more vulnerable to disease. Stretching out is a very convenient way to ease stress when you’re in the middle of a paperwork. Getting familiar with basic stretching techniques can significantly improve your blood flow, relax your tensed muscles and give you great relief.

Breathe, breathe, and breathe!

Before you open your mouth and say harsh words to someone, pause for a minute and take a deep gentle breath. It might be your usual reaction to take small, shallow breaths. But this can just aggravate your anxiety and make you feel more stressed. Take slow, deep breaths when you’re highly anxious. This calms your sympathetic nervous system and promotes relaxation.

Laugh out loud.

Feeling stressed with your work or family responsibilities? It’s time to have a good laugh. Just as the old saying goes – laughter is the best medicine. Watch a funny movie, invite over some friends and talk about silly things, or read a comic book. Cracking up promotes blood circulation and increases oxygen flow to your organs – two mechanisms that relieve your body from stress. In fact, just the anticipation of laughter can already pull down your stress levels.

State a positive mantra.

Don’t underestimate the power of positive suggestion. Find a phrase that gives you a sense of relief and motivation. For example, when confronted with a stressful situation, say “All is well”, or “This too, shall pass”. When you feel irritated on your spouse, child or parent, just tell yourself “He/she may have done something wrong but that doesn’t make him/her a bad person.”

Divert your attention.

Can’t think of a nice way to start your report? Have a break and do something that uplifts your spirit. Maybe you can take a walk outside, read a book, do some gardening stuff, or draw your dream house – anything that will distract you from succumbing to stress.

Cite five things you are thankful of.

Feeling down? Close your eyes, place your hands over your chest, take five deep breaths, and cite five things in your life that you are so thankful of. Slowly open your eyes and become completely refreshed!

Focus on what you want, not on what you don’t want.

Remember the law of attraction? Whatever you pay attention to grows. So if you pay attention to negative emotions, thoughts and feelings, they only get bigger and worse. But if you focus more on positivity, the whole universe conspires to help you become happier.

Focus on the present.

Whilst planning for the future is a good habit, when you’re stressed out it can become extremely overwhelming. Get in tune with your senses. Acknowledge what you feel – good or bad. Be aware of what’s happening deep inside you. Feel the ground beneath your feet, listen to your heartbeat, and feel the wind as it touches your skin. You can surely free yourself from stress by focusing on the now.

Stroke your pet.

When you spend even just a few minutes playing with your dog, or cat, your body releases feel-good hormones such as serotonin and oxytocin.  These hormones counter the damaging effects of stress and lower blood pressure and anxiety, and boost immunity.

Drink orange juice.

Vitamin C is effective in lowering your stress hormone levels, particularly cortisol. Apart from orange juice, you can also get vitamin C from grapefruit juice, strawberries, cabbage, and other green leafy vegetables. There’s actually more vitamin C to be found in in kale or red pepper than in an orange, Land these two are less acidic or sugary too.

Wishing you a stress free day.

Richard Scott
Clinical Hypnotherapist
http://www.greymatterz.co.uk

Part of the Core Health Centre

Overcoming the Fear of Failure

Eliminating fear of failure is something you cannot do overnight. It takes time and sheer determination. So to help you out, here’s a list of what you should do:

1.   Identify the root cause of your fear.
Was there a time in your life that people laughed at you because you failed? Were your parents too protective that they don’t want you to try new things and commit mistakes? If you are going to remember those events or difficult situations as if you are not a part of it, you will feel that it has nothing to do with you really. After all, past is past. You can’t change it. But you have full control of your future!

2.   Make it simple.
The more you simplify things, say your work or studies, the easier they become. And when you find a task easy, the more chances you’ll succeed on it.

3.   Understand that failure is inevitable.
Even the best leaders in the world have gone to several episodes of failure. Failing is as natural as breathing. Being fearful about it will only increase your failures in life.

4.   Failure is equivalent to success.
The best thing about failure is that it provides us an avenue to strive harder and do better. It gives us an opportunity to learn from our mistakes and prevent the same mistakes from happening again.

5.   Failure is only temporary.
While lamenting on the cruelty of failure, it may feel like the pain is not going to fade away. But just like any other difficulty in life, it shall pass and the pain will subside (whether you want it or not).

6.   Free your mind from negative thoughts.
Negative thoughts are like steel plates that are placed in your head. Imagine how heavy they are! Negative thoughts, due to the discomfort they bring, can affect how you handle thoughts and emotions, a fact that makes you more vulnerable to failures.

7.    Failure is not a bad thing.
Failure may bring a big buzz in your ear but it isn’t that bad as you think. As mentioned, failing gives you an opportunity to expand your horizon and do better next time!

8.    Face your fears! Act on it.
Failure to learn from a failure results to bigger failures. You’ve got to give any challenge your best shot.

9.    Focus on the now.
If you worry a lot of about failing, you will never have a chance to enjoy your life at the very  moment.

10.  Improve your skills.
One way to reduce the risk of failing is to constantly upgrade your skills and expand your  knowledge. The more prepared you are, the more likely you will succeed.

To sum it all up – while it’s true that failure often makes us feel troubled, it is an inevitable phenomenon that is designed to make us stronger and better.

Fear of failure only encourages failure itself so there’s really no point to be afraid at all. And although eliminating fear of failure can be a tough roller coaster ride, there are some things you can do to overcome it.

From identifying the root cause, simplifying things and accepting that failure is normal, to changing your perspective, facing your fears, focusing on the ‘present’ and constantly improving yourself – you can defeat your fear of failure and get your way to success.

Shoot for the stars…

Richard Scott
Clinical Hypnotherapist

http://www.greymatterz.co.uk

Turn Loneliness into a Deep Connection with Your Inner-Self

Do you ever feel disconnected from the world?

Do you feel cold, alone and helpless in the middle of a crowd?

Do you feel like no one is interested in hearing your stories?

It is true that loneliness feels draining, upsetting and distracting. It triggers our mind to dwell on undesirable thoughts and leads us away from happiness. But loneliness can be a good thing too, as it gives us an opportunity to reconnect with the person within us…

With the popularity of the social media, getting ‘connected’ seems as easy as hitting ‘enter’ on the computer keyboard or ticking on the ‘Like’, ‘Tweet’, ‘Post’, and ‘Share’  buttons on the screen. More and more people say they are lonely and have no one to talk to with regards to their personal problems. In fact, many experts believe that the country could be facing a loneliness epidemic.

Social connection is among things we value

Research has told us that there are a few things in life that we value more than anything else. These are love, intimacy, and social affiliation or connection with friends and family. That’s not really surprising knowing the fact that humans are ‘social beings’.

It is by building relationships with others that we get the motivation, energy and will to survive our day-to-day challenges and pursue for our dreams and aspirations. There’s no wonder also that without social connection, we become incapable of achieving happiness and fulfilment.

But why is it that despite the advancement in technology, such as the availability of mobile phones and the internet, many people still feel alone? Is it not true that these technologies have taken away the geographical boundaries that separate millions of people from each other?

Is it not true that today, it simply takes one text message or a 140-character status online to reconnect with friends and the rest of the society? Whilst all these are true, the modern way of communicating has deprived many of us from advancing our ‘heart skills’.

What are these skills? They are the qualities such as listening, observing, inspiring, serving and loving that foster joy and compassion. They are the skills that we can practise only through ‘human moments’ – the actual face-to-face interactions that sadly, are becoming very rare nowadays.

Although having a large social network does have plenty of benefits, it is not the quantity of friends that makes us feel connected, but the quality or the kind of friendships we create. It is also possible to be alone but not lonely.

As long as you are connected to your inner-self, it is possible to bust loneliness even without needing someone else by your side. This is what many people usually forget. They forget that deep within them is another person who is willing to be their friend, their guardian, and protector.

Embracing Loneliness and Reconnecting with Your Inner Self

Many people try to deal with loneliness by keeping themselves busy. Some engage in exercise, reading, or engage in sport while others resort to ‘unhealthy’ activities like drinking, smoking, and drug use.

Whilst these options may provide temporary relief, they do not, in any way, alleviate loneliness. And the more you try to avoid the feeling of loneliness, the more its effects become profound, it’s known as the ‘Law of reversed effect’. Sure you can find temporary relief, but you can never run away from the root cause of your loneliness.

Embracing loneliness is the key. Embracing means acknowledging and accepting the fact that something is not right, that something needs attention and that something needs to be fixed. So how do we embrace loneliness?

First of all, let the emotion take the centre stage. Let it flow through your system. Feel the rush of emotions and don’t be afraid if they suddenly feel overwhelming. You may find yourself crying in the end but the pain is going to be temporary. You have to feel comfortable with loneliness. Only then it starts to become your friend.

Taking time to be alone, without the distraction from the social media, TV, radio, or mobile phone, can help you recognise your emotions. Incorporating mindfulness meditation makes it easy to embrace loneliness.

Another way to connect with your inner self is to connect with nature. Nature gives us a comforting feeling that we may sometimes miss from the people around us. A recent study published in the Journal of Affective Disorders shows that taking walks in nature can increase well-being, even in the case of depression.

Another research by the University of Rochester reveals that reconnecting with nature increases our value of connectedness and closeness, and helps us become more caring and ready to share with others.

Self-Love to Ease Loneliness

Being friends with ourselves gives us a sense of connection that is far deeper than making friends with others. Just as the old saying goes, you can’t give something that you don’t have in the first place.

To share love, we must feel that we are loved and to share happiness, we must exhibit happiness. Self-love is the ultimate way to create a deep, meaningful and strong relationship with your inner self. Many people fear being alone.

But being alone actually gives us an opportunity to be ourselves and do things that please us. Being alone gives us enough time to recognise our emotions, figure out what we really need, plan for the future, and regain our energy.

Loneliness hurts. It is something that many of us are afraid to experience. Loneliness could mean being alone and having no one to turn to especially during difficult situations. But loneliness can serve as an avenue to establish a deep connection with our inner self.

By embracing loneliness and doing ways that make us closer to the person within us, such as giving time for silence, meditating, reconnecting with nature, it is possible to be alone without feeling lonely. Once you are able to free away the loneliness inside, you become more capable of establishing connections with others and the rest of the society.

Have a great day,

Richard Scott
Clinical Hypnotherapist
Grey Matterz

Part of the Core Health Centre

Natural Weight Loss Tips

Staying lean doesn’t just boost your self-confidence. It also keeps you healthy. But losing weight using unsafe methods can do you more harm than good. On this article, let’s talk about some of the best ways to burn stubborn fats without putting your health at risk!

 

Engage in Weight Training

There’s no doubt that exercising is the best strategy to lose excess fats. But many people think that regular exercising is a big pain in the bottom especially if you are not really into it. But it really is essential in order to lose weight faster. Weight training may be a better choice than aerobics if you’re looking to burn fat, but do speak to our experts here at Core Health to find out more.

 

Be a Slow Eater

Science was able to prove that by eating slower than usual, you can significantly reduce your weight. If you devour your food quickly, your brain may find it hard to measure your food consumption and recognise that your stomach is already full. Hence, you tend to eat more.

 

Dine Out Less Often

Fast food is not a good option if you are trying to lose weight. Remember, they are high in calories, sodium, and sugar which all promote fat production and storage. If you’re dining out, look for healthier menus such as green salad and leaner meat rather than the greasy burger, fatty fries and sugary pastries.

 

Don’t Be Fooled by the Word ‘Diet’

Many food products and fizzy drinks are so labelled to be a good choice for dieters. Some boast of having no sugar (although they taste too sweet!). Well, these foods usually contain artificial sweeteners that have been shown to cause brain cancer and promote obesity. So watch out for these diet sodas and similar stuff, they won’t really help you lose weight at all.

Also psychologically, the word DIET suggests starvation to your subconscious mind. So that part of your mind triggers a self preservation mechanism which can actually cause the body to start storing fats… without you even knowing what it’s doing.

 

Sip Green Tea

Green tea is highly regarded for its amazing health benefits. And you probably heard about its weight loss effects, especially now that many celebrities are on green tea, claiming it helps them stay lean. Well, that’s no hype! Green tea is scientifically proven to promote fat loss in several ways. First, it improves metabolism. Second, it suppresses appetite. Third, green tea aids in the burning of fats!

 

Low-Fat Diet May Not Be the Thing

Most products that are said to be ‘low in fat’ contain artificial sweeteners that promote obesity. A diet rich in ‘healthy’ fats, such as omega-3 fatty acids and monounsaturated fats is more likely to help you burn those stubborn fats than simply focusing on the ‘low fat’ diet. Good sources of healthy fats are fish, olive oil, canola oil, and flaxseeds.

 

Get Your Regular Dose of Niacin

Vitamin B3, or niacin, plays a critical role in fat loss. Niacin can be found in plenty of foods, such as yeast extract spread (marmite), fish, liver, peanuts, veal, chicken, and sundried tomatoes.

 

Cut Back on Sugar

High consumption of sugar has been linked to obesity, diabetes and heart disease. Sugary foods are also high in calories. Just a piece of glazed donut for instance, already contains whopping 255 calories! Yes, that’s basically enough to ruin your diet.

 

Consume More Fibre

Your gut needs fibre to properly digest food and promote metabolism. Also, getting enough fibre makes you feel full a lot longer and keeps your energy levels high. To boost your fibre intake, eat more of whole grain pastries than white breads, brown rice, beans, fruits and vegetables.

 

Fill Your Diet with Herbs

Cayenne, turmeric, bitter orange, flaxseed, and ginger are just few of the many herbs that have fat-burning effects. Adding them on your daily diet can certainly cut your risk of obesity.

 

Have a Good Night Sleep

Quality sleep is essential in maintaining a lean body. Getting enough sleep is necessary to maintain your hormonal levels – a critical factor for fat loss. Studies reveal that people who lack sleep are more likely to become overweight than those who enjoy quality sleep.

We at Core Health are here to help you shed that excess weight. Both mentally through hypnosis and physically through personal training.

I look forward to your thoughts.

Richard Scott
Clinical Hypnotherapist
Core Health Centre

Is your child suffering from Stress & Anxiety?

Children experience various forms of anxiety and stress from the moment they are born?

Sometimes, it is easy to spot whether a child is anxious by their crying and clinging behaviour. But as they advance in age, children may start hiding their anxiety. Nevertheless, it will still reflect in their actions.

You can help your child effectively deal with anxiety and stress through the following:

Schedule a ‘fun’ time.

Piles of homework can certainly drain your child energy and make them prone to anxiety and stress. Even sports activities can be physically and mentally stressful too. So make sure they have time to have some ‘pure fun’. You can organise fun yet relaxing activities, such as drawing, painting, a tea party, build a secret ‘Den’ or even play some games that don’t require too much competition.

Teach your child to become his own superhero.

It is very common for children to have fears, just as adults do. But the problem with many parents is that they tend to encourage their kids to avoid their fears, instead of facing them. But the more they hide from their fears, the more they will be hunted by it. So slowly, help your child become used to the things they fear the most. Normally, anxiety is reduced in 20-45 minutes of staying in the fear-provoking situation. If your child is suffering from intense fear or phobia, it is advisable to seek therapy as soon as possible.

Emphasise their good side.

Children with severe anxiety tend to focus on their negative side – their flaws, things they cannot do, etc. Negative thinking makes your child hate herself and other people. You can help your child become more positive by giving attention to their good side – talents, skills and strengths. Congratulate your child for scoring high in their test, maybe teach them some new skills, and surround them with positive people.

Make sure your child sleeps on time.

Lack of sleep has been found to make children more irritable and stressed. It is important that they get at least 8 to 10 hours of sleep every night. To promote quality sleep, set a bedtime schedule that must be strictly followed even during weekends.

Enhance their problem-solving skills.

Critical thinking must be developed at the earliest age possible. If you keep on solving even the little problems your child encounters, they will just learn to become dependent on you. Now, what if she faces a problem at school and you aren’t there? It will make your child more anxious and exhausted. Allowing your child to solve their own problems (with your guidance of course) will greatly benefit them, especially as they grow older.

Organise relaxation exercises.

Perhaps one of the best relaxation techniques can be taught to your child at night in the form of a bedtime story. At night as your child closes their eyes to sleep, you may ask your child to think or imagine a very relaxing place, such as a garden or a magical place, and have them imagine what that place looks like. Ask them to listen to the sounds in this place, to describe any smells or tastes. Ask them if it’s a hot, cold or warm place or is it just right.

Have them create their own story about this place and encourage them to go exploring this safe and magical place.

This technique engages with the child’s imagination and these techniques are very commonly used in hypnotherapy, a discipline which has been scientifically proven to reduce anxiety symptoms and relieve stress.

Be the role model.

You don’t expect your child to become free from stress and anxiety if you yourself are having similar issues! Children follow what their parents do. For them, anything you say or do is right. So be the role model of your own child. Positivity is contagious. If you are always positive, your child can easily acquire your personality through ‘transference’ without you having to do so much effort!

Never lose hope.

No matter how hard it is, never stop trying. Anxiety and stress can be very hard to overcome but it doesn’t mean your child wouldn’t be able to deal with them anymore. Just keep following these tips and discover a great difference.

Also, you may want to see a therapist to guide your child. A professional practitioner is equipped with the skills and knowledge to reduce anxiety and stress in children, just as they can effectively deal with adult issues.

I hope these tips help you to help your child back into a positively stress-free lifestyle. But remember, if you have any questions or would like to seek further help you can contact me through the methods below.

All the best,

 

Richard Scott
Clinical Hypnotherapist at Grey Matterz
Part of the Core Health Centre.

http://www.greymatterz.co.uk

email: info@greymatterz.co.uk

Are we really in ‘The Matrix’?

Being rational beings, it is our nature to make interpretations out of many thingssurrounding us, from the events that are happening, to the situations we’re into, and the emotions we feel. Sometimes, such interpretations are correct. Many times though, they’re wrong.

The way we interpret things around us may help us see the truth behind every event or situation we experience. Or, it could also distort the reality and make us believe negative things that have never existed at all!

There are many ways by which we distort reality. Here are some of them:

All-or-Nothing Thinking

Some people see things in extreme. This means a small, unnoticeable error in the project they are working on means it’s a complete trash; if someone doesn’t love them, it means that person already hates them; if they didn’t get it right the first time, they can never ever get it right no matter how they try. In short, they are the ‘all or nothing’ people. They often miss the reality that often, some things aren’t always one way or the other way around. They ignore that fact that there’s always ‘shades of grey’.

Conclusive Thinking

There are people who are fond of generalising things. Unknowingly, they are actually distorting the reality because they tend to look only at one angle of their life and make a conclusion out of it. For instance, if they fail in a business, their tendency is to stop and never try again – thinking that ‘once a failure, always a failure’.

Fortune-Telling

No one can ever predict what’s going to happen in the future as we can’t tell exactly what’s going to happen tomorrow or in the next few hours. Still, there are people who act as if they are fortune-tellers – predicting the future with strong conviction as if they were realities of the past. You’ll often hear them saying ‘I won’t ever make it’, ‘I will never find true love’, ‘I will be depressed for the rest of my life’, ‘I’ll never become rich’, etc.

Emotional Reasoning

Sometimes, our emotions can be deceiving because they often rule out our rational judgement. But basing on emotions alone is not enough to establish reality. For instance, a person who feels he is a failure doesn’t mean he is indeed a failure in reality. It is normal to experience emotional ups and downs. Assessing your emotions and their real cause is the key towards determining whether it speaks of reality or not.

Mind-Reading

Just because your friend ignored you the other day doesn’t mean she is mad at you or she doesn’t care about you anymore. Maybe, she just didn’t see that you were there, or she was thinking of something else that she didn’t notice your presence. Just because your spouse didn’t greet you a ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ doesn’t mean he or she doesn’t love you anymore. It’s possible that they’re into a surprise dinner date, or so caught up with problems at work. Being judgemental towards other people’s behaviour can certainly ruin one’s personal and social relationships.

Taking the Blame

Some people tend to distort reality by being too paranoid, thinking that every negative accusation, remark or criticism is directed towards them. This way of thinking can greatly affect your wellbeing and stress you out because you tend to feel guilty and responsible for things you haven’t done!

Mythical Thinking

Conventional views can ruin your judgement and distort the way you perceive reality. For instance, if you see a couple who don’t seem to mind each other – one is browsing on his mobile phone and the other is very absorbed in her reading, it’s easy to conclude that they not the ‘sweet type’ or they don’t care about each other. But that scene which only took few moments is not enough to interpret their relationship correctly. Above all, keeping in mind that your interpretation of things around you may be faulty or incomplete will prevent you from making hurtful and distressing judgments.

Positive Thinking to Restore Reality

All the ways mentioned above usually spring from negative thinking. They all can bring you pain, discomfort, and distress. When your mind is full of negative thoughts, you will never feel at peace.

To correct the habits that tend to distort your view of reality, you should learn how to think and respond positively. Opening your mind to possibilities without going away from the facts is healthy. But if you always make interpretations from a negative point of view, you are simply exposing yourself to things that will make you anxious, and later on, depressed.

If you need some help to change your own thoughts, contact me, I’ll be happy to help you.
Happy Thoughts,

Richard Scott
Clinical Hypnotherapist
www.greymatterz.co.uk
Part of the Core Health Centre
www.corehealthcentre.co.uk

Attachment Anxiety Can Make You Physically Sick

An interesting article on how Attachment Anxiety can lower the body’s power of immunity.
Have a read…

Don’t let anxiety rule your life.

People who constantly need reassurance that they are loved, excessively worried about being rejected, and interpret ambiguous events in their relationships negatively are at risk of developing serious illnesses, a new research reveals.

Anxious individuals have lower immunity

In a study published in the journal Psychological Science, researchers found that people who are always worried and anxious about their romantic relationships lower down their immunity levels, a fact that makes them more vulnerable to health diseases. For this study, psychologists from University’s Institute of Behavioural Medicine Research (IBMR) asked a number of married couples to complete a questionnaire about their relationship to assess whether they have attachment anxiety and in what way it affects their health. After taking the test, saliva and blood samples from the participants were taken to measure their stress levels. Most of the couples have been together for over 12 years.

Researchers found that participants who had higher attachment anxiety produced 11% more cortisol than those with lower levels of attachment anxiety. They also noticed fewer T cells among these participants. T cells are a group of white blood cells that play a major role in strengthening the body’s immunity. According to Lisa Jaremka, the study lead author and a postdoctoral fellow at the University, higher levels of cortisol is linked to fewer T cells because such hormone has immunosuppressive effect, which means it can inhibit the production of the immunity-boosting cells. In past studies, low number of T cells was found to impair a person’s immunity response to vaccine. It has also been linked to an ageing immune system.

What is attachment anxiety?

Everyone has a different way to secure the attachment that binds them with their special someone. Also called attachment style, it refers to a part of your personality that determines how you behave in close relationships. Two of the most common attachment styles are the avoidance attachment, and the attachment anxiety. The former is characterised by a person’s reluctance to trust and depend on his or her partner and the fear of intimacy. The second one springs from the intense need of assurance that he or she is loved, and the fear of being abandoned. Jaremka explains that attachment anxiety is a phenomenon related to childhood development. When guardians or parents are responsive of their children’s needs, especially in times of distress, these kids easily learn how to rely on people when they become adults. On the other hand, those who experienced rejection tend to develop self-insecurities that generally manifest during adulthood.

The good news is, according to Jaremka, there is research-based evidence that people with attachment anxiety can change. And hypnosis can be one of the most effective ways to effect change in those such people by training your mind to think differently.

If you have any questions about stress, anxiety or panic attacks or would simply like some more information about hypnosis, please visit my website at http://www.greymatterz.co.uk or send me an email to info@greymatterz.co.uk.

I look forward to hearing your thoughts and answering your questions.

Richard Scott

Clinical Hypnotherapist at Grey Matterz Hypnotherapy
Based at the Core Health Centre

http://www.greymatterz.co.uk
http://www.corehealthcentre.co.uk